Colorado Mediation with Attorney Liken: a Neutral Who Has Seen Both Sides
Mediation is how most Colorado family cases actually end: not with a judge's ruling, but with an agreement the two of you wrote, signed, and can live with. Charles E. Liken Jr. serves as a neutral mediator for divorce, parenting, support, property, and post-decree disputes — and, on the other side of the table, as counsel who prepares clients to get the most out of someone else's mediation.
Charles E. Liken Jr., Esq. — On the Legal Front Lines · Government Investigator, Denver Human Services · Licensed Colorado Attorney ~ 20+ Years in Private Practice · Colorado Deputy District Attorney · Colorado Court-Appointed Child and Family Investigator · Neutral Mediator
What mediation is — and what it is not
Mediation is a structured negotiation run by a neutral person who has no power to decide anything. The mediator's job is to keep the conversation productive, surface the interests underneath each side's positions, test proposals against what a court would likely do, and turn "we could never agree" into a written document. The parties keep every decision. A judge, by contrast, hears a few hours of evidence and imposes a result that fits the statute, not your calendar, your kids' activities, or your business.
Two honest limits. A mediator does not represent either of you and cannot give either side legal advice, even a mediator who is a lawyer. And an old mediator's saying holds: a good settlement is one neither side loves but both sides can live with. Mediation is not about winning. It is about ending the fight on terms you chose.
Why Colorado courts push mediation first
Colorado's Dispute Resolution Act (C.R.S. § 13-22-301 and following) lets any court refer a case to mediation, and the family courts use that power constantly. In most judicial districts, including Boulder, Weld, and Larimer, the case-management order entered at your Initial Status Conference requires the parties to mediate before the court will hold a contested hearing on parenting or financial issues. The court wants to know the parties genuinely tried.
The statute builds in a safety valve: a party who has been the victim of domestic violence by the other party can object to mediation, and the court will not compel it. Where mediation does go forward in those cases, separate rooms and separate arrival times are standard.
The practical effect is that mediation is not optional for most contested family cases. The only real choice is whether you walk in prepared.
What we mediate
- Divorce and legal separation — the whole case in one process: parenting, support, maintenance, property, and debt, written into a Separation Agreement the court can enter.
- Parenting plans — the weekly schedule, holidays, decision-making, exchanges, communication, travel, and a plan for changes as children grow.
- Child support and maintenance — income questions, deviations from the guideline, duration, and step-downs.
- Property and debt division — the home, retirement accounts, business interests, vehicles, and who carries which debt.
- Post-decree modifications — changing a parenting schedule, support, or decision-making after circumstances change.
- Relocation — long-distance parenting plans when one parent needs to move.
- Parentage and unmarried parents — parenting responsibilities and support outside a divorce.
- Grandparent and kinship issues — visitation and care arrangements involving extended family.
- Prenuptial and postnuptial terms — working through the terms both future spouses can sign.
- Probate and family disputes — disagreements among heirs, siblings, or family-business owners.
How a mediation session works, start to finish
- Agreement to mediate. Both parties (and their attorneys, if any) sign a short agreement covering confidentiality, fees, and ground rules. The mediator confirms there is no conflict of interest with either side.
- Pre-mediation prep. Each side sends a brief confidential summary: what is agreed, what is disputed, and the documents that matter (financial disclosures, the current parenting schedule, any existing orders). Well-prepared parties settle faster.
- Opening. The mediator explains the process and the rules, and each side says, in its own words, what it needs. This is often the first time each person has heard the other's priorities without a lawyer in between.
- Joint session or separate rooms. Some couples work best at one table; many do better in "caucus," with the mediator moving between rooms carrying proposals and reality-testing each one. Video mediation works the same way with breakout rooms.
- Proposals and counter-proposals. Offers made in mediation are not binding and cannot be used in court, which frees both sides to explore options they would never put in a court filing.
- Reality check. A mediator who has litigated these cases for decades can tell each side, privately, how a judge is likely to see a particular position. That is usually where the last gap closes.
- Memorandum of understanding. Agreed terms are written down before anyone leaves. If both parties sign, the terms are enforceable; if either wants attorney review first, the memorandum says so.
- Paperwork and the court. The agreement becomes a Separation Agreement, Parenting Plan, or stipulated order and is filed with the court. When the judge approves it, it is the order of the court.
Most family mediations run a half day to a full day. Complex financial cases sometimes take two sessions; a single post-decree issue can be done in two hours.
Confidentiality: what stays in the room
Under C.R.S. § 13-22-307, mediation communications are confidential and privileged. What is said in mediation, the offers made, and the mediator's notes cannot be introduced in court, and the mediator cannot be subpoenaed to testify about them, with narrow exceptions such as a threat of bodily harm, a report required by the child-abuse reporting laws, or an agreement by all parties to disclose. A written agreement signed by the parties is the exception by design: that document is meant to leave the room and become an order.
Colorado law is also specific about what counts as an agreement. Verbal understandings reached in mediation are not enforceable. If it matters, it gets written and signed before the session ends.
Mediation vs. going to court
| Mediation | Contested hearing | |
|---|---|---|
| Who decides | You and the other party | The judge |
| Timeline | Days to a few weeks to schedule; usually one session | Typically 6–12 months to a permanent orders hearing on the Front Range |
| Cost | One neutral's fee, usually split; far fewer attorney hours | Two attorneys through discovery, motions, experts, and trial |
| Privacy | Confidential by statute | Public courtroom; filings in the court record |
| Fit to your life | Any lawful terms you both accept, including things a court could not order | Limited to what the statute lets the judge order |
| Durability | Agreements people wrote themselves are followed more and litigated less | The losing side often returns with a modification motion |
| Relationship after | Co-parents who negotiated once can usually do it again | Trial hardens positions for years |
How to prepare (and why it matters more than anything)
- Bring the numbers. Your Sworn Financial Statement, recent pay stubs, tax returns, account statements, and a list of debts. Run the child support and maintenance calculators so you know the guideline range before you sit down.
- Know your best alternative. What happens if you do not settle? A realistic sense of the likely court outcome, including cost and delay, is the yardstick for every offer.
- Separate interests from positions. "I want the house" is a position. "I need the kids to stay in their school and I need housing I can afford" is an interest, and there are several ways to meet it.
- Draft a proposed parenting plan. Even a rough calendar of a normal two weeks, holidays, and summer gives the session a starting point. Our parenting time guide walks through the pieces.
- Decide who attends. Attorneys can attend with you or be available by phone for the signing. New partners, parents, and friends generally do not attend.
- Sleep. Mediation is decision-making under pressure. Arrive rested, eat first, and plan for the day.
Two ways to work with Attorney Liken
As your neutral mediator
Attorney Liken mediates for couples and families who want a resolution written by someone who has sat in every chair: prosecutor, defense lawyer, family-law litigator, and court-appointed Child and Family Investigator. He does not represent either party. He does keep the session honest about what a Colorado court would likely do, which is what moves people off entrenched positions. Both parties can have their own attorneys review any agreement before it is filed.
Mediation fees are quoted in writing before you book and are normally split between the parties unless you agree otherwise.
As your attorney at someone else's mediation
If your case has been ordered to mediation with another neutral, preparation is where the outcome is decided. Attorney Liken prepares clients with a written settlement range, a proposed parenting plan, the financial exhibits, and a plan for the room, and attends the session or stands by to review the memorandum before it is signed. This can be handled as limited-scope representation for that one event.
Available as limited-scope ("unbundled") representation without taking on the whole case.
When mediation is not the right tool
Mediation assumes two people who can negotiate in good faith with roughly equal information. It is the wrong first step when there is an active safety risk, when one party is hiding assets or income and disclosures have not been exchanged, when one side refuses to participate at all, or when the issue is a pure legal question a judge has to decide, such as jurisdiction. In those situations the better sequence is a protection order, a motion to compel disclosure, or a ruling on the threshold issue, and then mediation on the rest. If you are unsure which situation you are in, that is a good consultation question.
Mediation FAQ
Is mediation required in Colorado divorce and custody cases?
Not by statute for every case, but most judicial districts require it by court order before a contested hearing on parenting or financial issues. The court can excuse mediation for good cause, including domestic violence.
Do I need a lawyer to mediate?
No. Many parties mediate without attorneys. Because the mediator cannot advise either side, it is wise to have an attorney review the written agreement before you sign or file it, especially on retirement division and maintenance terms that are hard to change later.
Is what I say in mediation confidential?
Yes. C.R.S. § 13-22-307 makes mediation communications privileged and inadmissible, with narrow exceptions. A signed written agreement is not confidential; it is meant to be filed.
What if we agree on some things but not everything?
That is a normal outcome. A partial agreement is written and signed, and the remaining issues go to the court, usually with a much shorter hearing.
Can we mediate before anyone files?
Yes. Pre-filing mediation is common for couples who want an uncontested divorce; the agreement is filed with the joint petition.
How long does it take?
A typical family mediation is a half day to a full day. Post-decree issues are often two hours. Complex financial cases may take two sessions.
Can we do it by video?
Yes. Video mediation with breakout rooms works well, particularly where the parties live far apart or prefer not to be in the same building.
What happens after we sign?
The agreement is turned into the court's forms, filed, and reviewed by the judge. If the judge approves it, it becomes an enforceable court order.
Does the mediator report to the judge?
Only whether mediation occurred and whether the case settled in whole or in part. The mediator does not report what was said or who was reasonable.
This page is general information about Colorado mediation and family-court procedure, not legal advice about your case.
Thinking about mediating, or been ordered to? Let's figure out which role Attorney Liken should play and what you need before the session.
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